PureBoard

/* Windoof '98 source code */

/*
TOP SECRET Maxischrott(c) Code
Project: Pariscago(tm)
Projected release-date: Summer 1998
*/

#include "win31.h"
#include "win95.h"
#include "evenmore.h"
#include "oldstuff.h"
#include "billrulz.h"

#define INSTALL_HARD

char make_prog_look_big[1600000];

void main()
{
while(!CRASHED)
{
display_copyright_message();
display_bill_rules_message();
do_nothing_loop();
if (first_time_installation)
{
make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
do_nothing_loop();
totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS2();
hang_system();
}

write_something(anything);
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
do_some_stuff();

if (still_not_crashed)
{
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
basically_run_windows_3.1();
do_nothing_loop();
do_nothing_loop();
}
}

if (detect_cache())
disable_cache();

if (fast_cpu())
{
set_wait_states(lots);
set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
set_mouse(action, jumpy);
set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
}


/* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11");*/
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 95"); */
printf("Welcome to Windows 98");

if (system_ok())
crash(to_dos_prompt);
else
system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp",
O_CREATE);

while(something)
{
sleep(5);
get_user_input();
sleep(5);
act_on_user_input();
sleep(5);
}

create_general_protection_fault();
}

/*
TOP SECRET Maxischrott(c) Code
Project: Windel(tm)
Projected release-date: October 2001
$History$
*/

#include "system_errors.h"
#include "stdlib.h"
#include "msdos_bugs.h"
#include "win31.h"
#include "workst~1.h"
#include "oldstuff.h"
#include "billrulz.h"
#include "monopoly.h"
#include "assembler.h"
#define INSTALL = HARD

char make_prog_look_big[1600000];
layout set near CarbonLook() of (Mac OS X)
set bluescreen color = #0000ff;

void main()
{
while(!CRASHED)
{
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();

if (detect_cache())
disable_cache();

registry_size = registry_size + 200 kB;

if (first_time_installation)
{
make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
install msn();

search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS/2();
totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
make_futile_attempt_to_damage_Linux();
disable_Netscape();
hang_system();
}
write_something(anything);

display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();

seek for OEM CD at Drive D:\ E:\ F:\ G:\ H:\

do_some_stuff();
if (still_not_crashed)
{
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
basically_run_windows_3.1();
do_nothing_loop();
make busy harddisk drive(30sec);
do_nothing_loop();
}
}

if (fast_cpu())
{
set_wait_states(lots);
set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
set_mouse(action, jumpy);
set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
}

/* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 95"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 98"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 3.0"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 2000"); */
printf("Welcome to Windows XP");

if (system_ok())
crash(to_dos_prompt);
else
system_memory = open("c:\swp001.swp" O_CREATE);

if detect [Netscape/Mozilla]
{
message ("New default Browser is MSIE");
delete Netscape(); install MSIE 5.5(== 80MB);
smarttags.enabled:=true;
}

if user install software
{
if subdir <> "c:/windows/system";
set install path to c:/windows/system;
}

while(something)
{
sleep(5);
get_user_input();
sleep(5);
act_on_user_input();
while printer usage set soundcard == off;
}
create_general_protection_fault();
crash(complete_system);
return(unrecoverable_system);
}

Win 98 hat geschrieben:/* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11");*/
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 95"); */
printf("Welcome to Windows 98");

Josef Sniatecki hat geschrieben:[ernst]
@hardfalcon:
Hat mich auch schon gewundert. Wäre woll angebracht die Copyrights
aus den Humor-Codes zu löschen und irgendwas erfundenes darüber
zu schreiben.

Mein Code auf Seite 36 hat aber nichts Verlätzliches stehen . Immerhin
ist das aus einer bekannten C++ Humor Seite.

Aber nun wieder...
[/ernst]

/*
TOP SECRET Maxischrott(c) Code
Project: Pariscago(tm)
Projected release-date: Summer 1998
*/